lifebeyondexaggeration

What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stranger

The Beauty in Sight October 23, 2019

I just got contact lenses for the first time.

I know, I’m a little bit past that phase of life, but bear with me. I’ve had a prescription for glasses for a few years. It was a very light Rx, so I basically only wore my glasses for watching movies, hiking, international travel, and Disney World. My head is so large, glasses that aren’t comically big give me a headache, so it just never seemed worth it.

But I took a chance at my eye exam and asked if I could have contacts, and the doctor said yes!

Getting them in and out in the office wasn’t that bad. I think my years of sticking on fake eyelashes eight times a week finally came in handy. I popped those suckers in…and life became amazing!

Trees have leaves. So many freakin’ leaves! And roof singles don’t all sit at one level―they stack on top of each other! Signs have lots of words, I can tell it’s a stick, not a bird in the river, and the people in the audience have faces.

Audience members have feelings and reactions while you’re performing for them. Not all of them good. It’s shocking how many expressions the people staring at you can cycle through in a short amount of time.

Okay, so I did scratch my eyeball trying to get my contact out. And maybe I gave myself a cyst on my eyeball because of said scratch, but screw it. Contacts are the freakin’ best, and I’m never going back to fuzzy life.

(Once I wait three to four days for my eyeball to heal.)

 

Lessons I Wish I’d Learned February 15, 2019

I can sew on a button. I can almost manage to do my taxes on my own. I’ve consistently worked in my chosen field since leaving college. There are areas I’m lacking that could improve if I really wanted to put the effort into learning.

Like how to change a tire. How to cook. How to clean up the desktop of my computer so I can actually find files when I need them.

But there are some topics in which the information is so spread out across so many different resources, it’s hard to figure out what the actual best practice is.

Let’s look at it at a base level. If you’re going on a trip to Disney World and you want to know what the best order to ride the rides is in order to avoid the worst of the lines: If you Google it, you’re going to get twelve different answers. Of course, if there were one definitive answer, it would be out of date as soon as everyone read the list and started flocking to the same places in the same order. (more…)

 

A Heated Hibernation May 9, 2016

The time has come my friends. Since I’m not heading back up to Alaska this year, it’s time for me to crawl into my air-conditioned hidey-hole and wait out the Florida summer. I’m making my last pilgrimage to Orlando this summer, and then that’s it. I will be hiding until the fall.

It’s not just the overwhelming heat that makes me wonder if someone is literally trying to melt my bones; it’s not the sun that gives me a fun rash if I let it touch me for too long. It’s not the Orlando crowds that make even the Space Ship Earth line two hours long. I could even deal with the stingrays that stab your feet if you accidentally scare them. It’s more the sweaty combination of all those things mixed with the inexplicable hatred of having my feet get too hot.

But there are plenty of amazing inside activities I can do. I’ll just pretend it’s winter up north. I’ll curl up under the AC unit and binge on Netflix. I’ll finally learn how to play Rook and Pinochle. I can do a puzzle, read books, write books even. I’m even taking a break from the heat to head up north and do some serious camping. (I’m finally climbing Cadillac Mountain, y’all!)

I know I’m doing it in the wrong direction, but this is how my clock works. Hibernation is upon us. As John Snow says: Summer is coming.

 

The Flying Phone November 11, 2013

Filed under: I Meant Well — meganorussell @ 8:05 am
Tags: , , , , , , ,

Sometimes I am not so very smart. Sometimes horrible things happen because of this unfortunate trait.

My husband and I have spent a lot of time working in Florida. And we love Disney World and Islands of Adventure. When we visit Orlando, we wake up at 5am and head toward adventure! I’m not a morning person, so my brain is fairly non-functional on these really early drives.

One fateful morning, we loaded our friends into the car horribly early and started driving down the road. We turned onto the main road a block away from our condo, and one of my tired friends said, “Megan, is your phone pink?”

“Yes,” I mumbled, curling up in my seat.

“Oh… ‘cause something pink just flew off the roof of the car.”

My phone, which I had only had for a week, had flown off the roof of the car and into traffic.

I said to leave it, but one of the guys in the car opened his door and ran across the six-lane road on a desperate rescue mission. Miraculously, he made it back to the car with my phone. The little pink phone hadn’t even turned off.

The pink phone and its case are still with me today. True, it probably wasn’t the smartest thing for someone to run across traffic to save it, but I love my little phone. Qwerty keyboard and all.