I just got contact lenses for the first time.
I know, I’m a little bit past that phase of life, but bear with me. I’ve had a prescription for glasses for a few years. It was a very light Rx, so I basically only wore my glasses for watching movies, hiking, international travel, and Disney World. My head is so large, glasses that aren’t comically big give me a headache, so it just never seemed worth it.
But I took a chance at my eye exam and asked if I could have contacts, and the doctor said yes!
Getting them in and out in the office wasn’t that bad. I think my years of sticking on fake eyelashes eight times a week finally came in handy. I popped those suckers in…and life became amazing!
Trees have leaves. So many freakin’ leaves! And roof singles don’t all sit at one level―they stack on top of each other! Signs have lots of words, I can tell it’s a stick, not a bird in the river, and the people in the audience have faces.
Audience members have feelings and reactions while you’re performing for them. Not all of them good. It’s shocking how many expressions the people staring at you can cycle through in a short amount of time.
Okay, so I did scratch my eyeball trying to get my contact out. And maybe I gave myself a cyst on my eyeball because of said scratch, but screw it. Contacts are the freakin’ best, and I’m never going back to fuzzy life.
(Once I wait three to four days for my eyeball to heal.)