What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stranger

The Terrifying Trailer April 17, 2018

Filed under: Myths and Legends — meganorussell @ 11:30 am
Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

I learned a thing about myself the other day.

I’m afraid of truck trailers.

I discovered this while backstage at a show. We were in a tiny venue where the semis the set travels on were pulled up to one of the quick change stations. There wasn’t a door between us and the trucks. The trailer doors were wide open and pointed right at us as we changed.

These gaping metal voids made the hairs on the back of my neck prickle, and at first I thought maybe it was just because there were shadows in the trailers that looked a little spooky. And then I realized modern media has taught me to be terrified of empty semis!

There are really only three purposes to semis:

1) You’re an evil dude ferrying illegal immigrants across the border. You’re inevitably going to leave the poor immigrants locked in the back too long, and the police are going to arrive just in time to save the smallest child while the other sixty people you have trapped like caged chickens die.

2) You’re a serial killer, and you’ve converted the trailer into your torture chamber. There’s a fake wall where you hold your victims while going through checkpoints, but take a black light in there and all you’re going to see is blood. And probably scratch marks from where one of your victims tried to claw their way to freedom.

3) You’re hoarding zombies as a booby trap. You tossed a dead pig in to attract the undead and have kept them in a warm, compact place to continue decaying until someone tries to steal from you. Then you’ll let the swarm of stinky zombies tear them apart.

There is no non-nefarious purpose to an empty semi-trailer! I’ve learned this!

Do I defend my natural instinct to run away while only half-dressed in my monkey costume?

Yes, I do.

Do I think all truck drivers are killer zombie hoarders?

Of course not. That would be rude and wildly unrealistic.

Am I going to stop consuming the media that’s given me this strange fear?

Probably not.

But tell me that empty trailers aren’t creepy. They’re the dark basements of the highway. I will obey my instincts and run away.

On a more authorly note, follow your instincts and run toward the Rafflecopter I’m hosting right now. The grand prize is a Kindle Fire 7 loaded with Dystopian reads! It’s easy, quick, and free. Follow this link and enter to win:


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s