What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stranger

Pre-Zombie Preperation May 21, 2016

What is the one skill you wish you knew in case the zombie apocalypse started tomorrow? I know, I know. Zombies aren’t real (yet), but humor me. What is the one thing you’ll wish you had Googled?

Would it be how to shoot a crossbow, or better yet, how to build one of your own? Building a fire would be a really good thing to know, but I think, and I could be very naïve on this one, that most people can light a decent fire. So what about lighting a fire without matches or a lighter?

There are some things that would be beyond reasonable effort. Like gas. Gasoline does actually go bad. If you’re on your own in the cold, cruel, zombie-ridden world, you’re probably not going to be able to do all the things you would need to make more gas; that would require a new world structure. So car repair skills aren’t actually going to be helpful for long. Bike repair: that might be a great thing to know before the zombies are nipping at your heels.

Making medicine would also be amazingly useful. Like at-home penicillin, which is a real thing you can do; making your own, albeit primitive, antibiotics would be life saving. In fact, all sorts of first aid would be great things to learn before the zombies come knocking at your door. When the emergency rooms are no longer functional, you’ll have to know what to do when you get frostbite or need stitches.

Map reading would also be a super useful tool! You’re trying to bike or walk to the next town. There’s no more Siri to steer you the right way, so you have to read a regular old map. What if you need to cross the wilderness? Reading a topographical map might mean the difference between making it through the mountain pass or joining the ranks of the undead. And don’t forget to pack your compass. You’ll need to know how to read that, too!

And how are you going to pass on your knowledge? What happens when the world runs out of Bic pens? I personally would love to know how to make my own paper and ink so I can pass down my zombie survival knowledge.

If you could pick one skill to learn before the zombies begin their brain-eating rampage, what would it be? Would you go for weapons or more basic survival? If you knew you had one week to study for the apocalypse, what would you Google first?


4 Responses to “Pre-Zombie Preperation”

  1. avwalters Says:

    Well, I’ve already got the crossbow thing down, so I guess I need more info about what’s edible in the forest.

  2. adequatedad Says:

    Water procurement and purification techniques. Without that, anything else seems a trivial skill.

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