My husband’s favorite holiday is Halloween. It’s a little weird. But I love him, so I deal with it. Every year, we try to find some really fun, exciting Halloween thing to do. Sometimes it’s a local haunted house, sometimes it’s scaring the pee out of small children at his parent’s house. But one year, we managed to make it to Halloween Horror Nights at Universal Studios in Orlando. This place is like the holy grail of pooping yourself in fear.
I’m not really a scary movie person. I can’t see them in theatres because I scream so loudly, everyone around me starts laughing at me. Even the elderly people who I am fairly certain wandered into the wrong theatre. Unfortunately, my screaming problem is not lessened at haunted houses. Especially ones as well done as Halloween Horror Nights.
There are eight different houses at this thing every year and outdoor scream zones. It’s crazy, ya’ll. And the thing about haunted houses is that the more you scream, the more they target you. These people smell fear and exploit it.
One of the houses was based on an old orphanage. We were going through a room filled with empty bunk beds, and someone flew out over the top of the bunk bed and hung in the air screaming at me! I stood there and screamed my little face off. There were people waiting to keep walking behind me, but I kept screaming bloody murder. There was no way in hell I was going to run under the evil flying demon to get to the other side. So we had a standoff. I stood and screamed. He hung in mid-air and screamed. I have no idea how long this battle of wills continued, but eventually he gave up, pulled his lever, and floated back down onto the bed.
I then ran like hell to the next room still screaming. I may get myself into some pretty strange situations, but I do know that if death is hanging in front of you, running under him is probably not the safe choice.