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What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stranger

A Bridal Breakdown: Part One December 21, 2013

Filed under: Marriage Mayhem — meganorussell @ 10:00 am
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My husband and I got married on December 28th. We had a beautiful winter wedding, which I will tell you all about later. In the months before the wedding, I was interning at a theatre. Luckily, I was working with my husband, but being an intern meant having no money and no time to plan a wedding. I was living six hours from the wedding venue and working sixty hours a week. I was a nervous breakdown waiting to happen.

Five days before the wedding, the company decided to have a “Dirty Santa” party. Don’t get too excited. Dirty Santa doesn’t involve naked time. It’s a game where everyone brings a present, and then you go through the group, picking presents out of the pile. After you open yours, the next person in line can choose a new gift or steal one that has already been opened. It’s fun, but it can get a little nasty.

Our scenic painter had forgotten about the party until we all showed up with presents. She ran up to her room, cut a spare bit of canvas, and wrote that she would turn one photo into a painting for whoever got the canvas.

The second she put that slip in the pile, people started eyeing it. I drew number two and got to choose my present second. Number one chose alcohol, and I picked out the canvas note. It was a risky move. Anyone could now steal the precious slip from me. But as I sat back in my seat, I gazed around the room giving them my best woman-on-the-verge-of-a-nervous-breakdown look and said, “This is perfect since I’m getting married in five days, ’cause I’m a bride.” All eyes were immediately averted from me and my precious piece of canvas. As the game wore on, people became bolder. One silly man actually walked toward me to steal my prize. I don’t know if it was the growl or the death glare that scared him away, but I don’t care. I won!

I didn’t actually end up using a wedding picture for the painting. I chose a photo from the first winter I spent with my husband. Just the two of us in the snow kissing under mistletoe. It’s a beautiful painting and the best dirty Santa gift I ever got. Sadly, that wasn’t the end of my bridal breakdown, but I’ll save that for next week.

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2 Responses to “A Bridal Breakdown: Part One”

  1. You do know Dec. 28th is the Day of the Holy Innocents, right?

    In Mexico (where my sister got married on the 28th of December many long years ago), the custom is for the kids to go around and ask to borrow money – which they then keep (stealing from innocents – long tradition).

    My poor husband-to-be, an American, got taken by the young children at the wedding – nobody told him what was going on. I was off being useful, and could not supervise him.

    5 months later, he still married me. I give him a lot of credit for that.


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